Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Ask Not for Whom the Bell Tolls...

The title of this post is inspired by a tragic event. An even that, as of this writing, happened a mere five hours ago at Sutter Roseville in the emergency room. Two years ago, a similar tragedy occurred in the form of the death of my would be Father in Law, Billy Eckhardt, who died of heart failure in his home the very day after two friends of mine were married.

A similar tragedy struck today, as you might have guessed from the timing of this post. Apparently God wasn't happy with just one Eckhardt parent keeping him company upstairs. Just three years after taking her dad, he decided that it was time for her mother to come home as well. This couldn't have come at a worse time. With no employment, my fiance can no longer afford to live in the house they moved into after the one they used to own was repossessed by the bank. Fortunately we have a pair of great friends who are willing to help her out by allowing her to stay with them.

I'm more worried about her mental state, really. So close to the death of her last parent, she's been going on and on about how she could have done something better or different, or how she should have listened a little more so that God wouldn't have punished her by taking her mother away.

I know that's ludicrous, and so does she. The thing that makes this so hard for me to bear is that she's like a lost little girl now that she doesn't have the rock of stability that her parents were. I'm doing my best, but I feel so incredibly inadequate in regards to this, even though I know I'm doing everything expected of me and more besides. I wish to high heaven that comic book physics worked so I could get bitten by a genetically altered insect or bombarded with gamma rays to gain superpowers. Maybe then I'd be able to do enough good to satisfy my conscience.

I don't know...